日期:2016-08-25 John is not a good student. He always sleeps in the class. Today he sleeps again. John! Teacher says angrily. What? Whats wrong? John is awaken. Why do you make a face? Its classroom. Look! Everyone is laughing. Teacher says. No one is laughing. Tea... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-08-25 Tony and his father are eating dinner. Suddenly Tony asks his father, Dad, are flies yummy? Dad frowns and says, No, I think its yucky. Why do you ask me this question? Its a silly question. But Tony says, There was one fly in your plate. 托尼正和他... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-08-25 The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly two hours, then he started again, and said he: Let me ask the evolutionist a question -- if we had tails like a baboon, where are they? Ill venture an answer, said an old lady, We have worn them... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-08-25 Im sorry, Madam, but I shall have to charge you twenty dollars for pulling your boys tooth. Twenty dollars! Why, I understand you to say that you charged only four dollars for such work! Yes, but this youngster yelled so terribly that he scared four... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-07-14 Tom was tired out, and he went to bed as soon as he reached home. Suddenly it occurred to him that he had planned to do something that evening. As he could not remember what it was, he tossed and turned in his bed for along time. Finally the thing c... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-06-21 A man was driving to work when a truck ran a stop sign ... hit his car broadside, and knocked him cold. Passerbys pulled him from the wreck and revived him. He began a terrific struggle and had to be tranquilized by the medics. Later, when he was ca... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-06-21 A shop owner closed his shop and went home. He was very tired but just as he went to bed, the telephone rang. A man asked, What time do you open your shop? The owner was angry about this phone call. He put down the telephone without answering and we... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-06-21 A: I have the perfect son. B: Does he smoke? A: No, he doesnt. B: Does he drink whiskey? A: No, he doesnt. B: Does he ever come home late? A: No, he doesnt. B: I guess you really do have the perfect son. How old is he? A: He will be six months old n... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-06-21 Dan was the doorman of a club in a big city. Everyday, thousands of people passed his door, and a lot of them stopped and asked him, Whats the time, please? After a few months, Dan said to himself, Im not going to answer all those stupid people any... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-06-21 Customer: Waiter, Ive only got one piece of meat in my dish. Waiter:Just a moment, sir and Ill cut it in two. 顾客:服务员,我盘子里怎么只有一块肉? 服务员:先生,请稍候,我去把它切成两块。... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-06-04 A friend was trying to encourage his elderly mother to enjoy the money, she had accumulated through frugal living. Mother, he said, you have enough money to last you until youre a hundred. And then whatll I do? she replied. 一位朋友试图劝他的老妈妈... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-06-04 After two weeks of Air Force basic training. I called home. You wouldnt believe how strict they are, I complained. They even give demerits for things like not hanging your towel straight or not tightening the cap of your toothpaste properly. Well, d... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-06-04 Frequent hand-washing in my job as a medical technologist and the harsh Alaskan weather combined to give me very dry skin. One night as I prepared for bed, I rubbed my hands with petroleum jelly and covered them with a pair of old white gloves. As I... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-06-04 My cooking has always been the target of family jokes. One evening, as I prepared dinner a bit too quickly, the kitchen filled with smoke and the smoke detector went off. Although both of my children had received fire-safety training at school, they... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-06-04 One of the guests turned to a man by his side to criticize the singing of the woman who was trying to entertain them. What a terrible voice! Do you know who she is? Yes, was the answer. Shes my wife. Oh, I beg your pardon. Of course, it isnt her voi... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-06-04 There were three professors at the railway station. They were deep in conversation. The train had just arrived, but they did not notice it. Then the guard shouted, Take your seats, please! The professors heard the guard and rushed for the train. Two... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-05-12 The cruise ship my friend was working on socked at a Mexican port during a very high tide. Everyone on board was forced to use the ships narrow gangplank as a passageway to the dock far below. The staff stood motionless when a passenger in her 70s a... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-05-12 A rich Paris banker begged a well-known artist to do a little thing for his album. The artist did the little thing and asked a million francs. Why, it only took you five minutes to do it, said the banker. Yes, replied the artist, but it took me thir... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-05-12 A judge, a bishop, and a conductor were having a discussion. All three were rather vain men, and their talk soon turned to the question of which of them was the greatest. Well, said the judge, My position is one of dignity and power. When I walk int... 阅读全文>>

日期:2016-05-12 A story around campus has it that a student once sent a telegram to his parents reading: Mom-flunked all courses. Kicked out of school, Prepare Pop. Two days later he received a response: Pop prepared. Prepare yourself. 在校园里广为流传着这样一个故... 阅读全文>>

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